How many times has your mind tricked you into choosing things, places and people out of fear of not being liked. Not fitting in. Not getting that job. Not being good enough.
Or perhaps being alone.
Are you tired of gaslighting yourself yet? Are you tired of always choosing others over you? Are you tired of turning away from deep intuitions, Gods simple blessings, the hunches that nurture you to your truest path? Are you tired of walking away from your highest good?
To be in a place of serving your highest good means to be in a place of nurturing ultimate fulfillment. It means to work toward your passion and purpose regardless of initial reward, dedicating yourself to honoring your truth, choosing a life of growth over comfort, expansion over contraction. It means deepening the relationship with yourself so that you can hear clearly the next step on your path. It means lingering in solitude long enough to hear the echo’s of Gods speech. And letting His speech vibrate through your being. That is what truth feels like. That is what choosing yourself feels like. Like Gods kisses are being placed along your spine. When waking up in the morning feels like a gift. When the earth and universe begin to nudge you in agreement, harmonizing with your existence. You are infinitely connected to the whole. Choose your truth.
As many times as I’d died, you think I’d be used to this feeling of rebirth. As I step into this new role, perhaps ancient identity—I find myself expanding in ways the physical eye cannot perceive.
I’d never enjoyed the idea of shrinking myself; of being quiet or silenced; of being docile and meek. Being raised by women daring to run against the grain to return to her nature, I’d been a witness to the unfolding process of the wild woman; as she leaves all that she has known to seek the bounty of the divine.
Marveling at the wild woman, I still feared her solitude as I captured her shadow, the isolation solidifying her lack of trust, turning one’s heart cold and speech bitter. The world shamed her for her lack of submission to patriarchal standards, maiming her an outcast of undeveloped community. She was ostracized, and in her exile was forced to nurture light in the midst of darkness. Her nature always frightened me– the threat of loneliness fastening tightly to my neck, going against my nomadic, communal nature. I ran away from the wild woman even as she beckoned me to a quiet patio to write tales of the divine, placing my forehead upon Gods plentiful earth, crooning in the arms of her bitter shadow until I was forced to see her beauty. Its amazing how stubbornly we run from that which we know can save us.
In calling in her archetype, I honor the nature of who I’ve always been and allow myself to step into the simple authenticity of being me. Peeling away each layer of identity underneath, I discover primal essence and return to the spiritual nature derived from God’s very breath. And in that moment, I realized that the wild woman was only called so because she had the courage the break loose of ego’s chains and do what everyone swore they could not.
Return to heaven by setting herself free.
This is the reopening of the journey of the wild woman.
– liminal space the “in between” that moment when waiting for a call but signals never quite picks up or perhaps the dial tone rings reminding you of words you’d wish you’d said now never to be uttered it’s the space of nothingness yet holding each possibility feet aching over journeys traveled then noticing the road’s spiraled into a dense river with no boat to cross its that moment before the ending right after the climax when all that is heard is steady beating in chests cramping in their stomach shoulders hijacked toward the crown sweet, perchance detrimental anticipation time truly seems to pause in the liminal steady whispers of “haven’t you been here before?” “are you excited to see what happens next,” “or does it haunt you?” battles unwon but not quite defeated the waiting game birthing unease, impatience, anxiety in liminal space that feeling of lack of control trying to hold on to yesterdays memories as a means of predicting tomorrow its like grasping sand between tense fingers the tiniest shards cutting into subtle skin insignificant pebbles marking impressionable membranes only to see its flight thorough diminutive passageways i suppose this lesson has never been easy even in quiet moments of recognition im aware all of the secrets of the universe slip beyond what feeble minds could grasp if it could grasp anything at all with a Creator so expansive so wise, All-Knowing i suppose all the best surprises are first kept secret in letting go of the need to predict trusting infinite wisdom settling into lifes deaths i suppose i still am getting accustomed to breathing in the stillness of liminal space
In the throes of a public health crisis, political militia, racial, social and economic injustice; the first half of 2020 has been admittedly nightmarish. Getting a clear look into the condition of the “elites” consciousness, civil rights and humanity, we arrive at the solemn conclusion of the spiritual death of Western culture. While not novel or surprising, it would be imprudent to discount the importance of mindful disconnection and reflection. When we are able to nurture a healthy balance between tuning into our inner joy, shame, guilt and often times grief only then can we better serve ourselves and the common good in dismantling these hierarchal structures of oppression.
This is a time of spiritual crisis. As we have seen over the course of the past few months, in an ongoing battle between dominion and power versus unconditional love and connectedness, America’s shadow has bubbled to the forefront calling for its death, rebirth and ultimate transformation.
. . .
Let me be clear; the very foundation of these systems were built on a ethic of lovelessness. Systems of oppression exists as they have been born from spiritual death birthing self-preservation, perceived lack of love and connectedness. When one identifies with lack, they will perpetuate its story; creating blockages and trudging silos of inequality to give birth to their unholy perception. Believing that the acclimation of power will somehow heal their innate sense of lack, the right to love is forfeited as love cannot exist in spaces where domination is the order of the day.
In bell hooks gracefully written volume “All About Love” she speaks on this very issue of power struggles. She writes;
“Domination cannot exist in any social situation where a love ethic prevails…When love is present the desire to dominate and exercise power cannot rule the day. Concern for the collective good of our nation, city or neighbor rooted in the values of love makes us all seek to nurture and protect the good.”
Concern for the collective directly involves the reemergence, building and support of community. When we tune into our desire to follow a love ethic, we understand that this value does not blossom in isolation. We cannot begin to dismantle systems of oppression when we are pitted against one another, lingering in pathological narcissism, white supremacies very philosophy which calls for denying our commonality, equal worth and connectedness. When we begin to build bridges with intent to meet one another in our wholeness, then we call back our innate power and build systems where its foundation is constructed on values of equality, community and love.
It is my hope that through my work as a healer, writer, daughter, sister, aunt, community member and finally lover, the ties of love be continuously emphasized and strengthened through discussion and strategic praxis. For, in this collaborative effort to experience loves redemptive, healing power, will we begin to each live in sync with The One—affirming our innate divine nature thus returning us back home.
Now is the time more than ever to be extremely observant. .
Don’t psyche yourself out. With the outbreak of COVID-19, coverage on all media platforms and the upcoming election; it is easy to play into this game of fear. Humans are interdependent creatures fostered by connectedness which will enable this story to inevitably play out in one of two ways. In the first, we “ping” off of each other’s shadows and choose to step into timelines of fear. Due to the threat of sickness & death, we become overcome with this anxious need to survive, at times forgetting that the key to survival is to remain calm in the face of danger and form together as a pact. Community is more important now than ever before. Do not break ties of love, connection and kindness due to being swarmed with low vibrational energies: anxiety, fear, doubt. Recognize tests for what they are and choose to ascend. .
In the second way, we sit back and observe the chaos. We protect ourselves and each other in the BEST way we can—physically, emotionally, mentally and spiritually. We are mindful of our nutrition, our hygiene, pause to think clearly and support one another with herbal, “wordful” and energetic medicines. We disconnect from lies and fear-mongering, invest our energy in creating spaces bred for thriving in the face of attempted mass-destruction rather than self-destructing. We are ever-mindful and cognizant of those less fortunate; without the privilege of working from home, buying fruits, vegetables, herbs, medicines, loved ones to cherish and those with no clear place to lay their head. As a result, we pass on assistance where we can. We remain cognizant of protecting both ourselves and others. We observe our own reactions, placing our faith and trust in a Higher Power, calling on that strength and maintaining our sovereignty. .
Please remember who you are. Be helpful. Be kind. Be mindful of what you think, of what you digest—literally and figuratively. Calm down your nervous system. Disconnect from media and tune into your heart. Tune into God. .
Genuinely Jannah 